Thursday, September 2, 2010

The Parent Trap

Lindsay Lohan is at the top of the news once again. I will save my opinion on her situation for private banter. However, I can't help but be intrigued by the talk surrounding her parents. You will not hear talk of Lindsay without hearing about her mess of a father and mother. If you know anything about my life, you will agree that I can relate, on many levels, to some of Lindsay's back story---or at least the story the media has shared with world.

Parenting it the most underrated job ever. Some people just have kids to satisfy their own personal desire to be loved, to dictate, and to fulfill their American dream of the All American Family.

A husband/wife and a couple of kids in a photo every Christmas does not a happy family make...

I was speaking with a friend today, and it amazed me to hear how much of our parents ideals were coming out of our mouths. From the type of family we wanted to the type of careers we wanted to have, it was obvious that the lives our parents led and the values, or lack there of, that they held dear directly affected us.

The fact that my friend's parents did not fully develop in the areas of education and professional achievement, prompted my friend to lack in development in those same areas. She says things like I am not good at that, or I am not good enough, smart enough, or ambitious enough do do that.

The fact that my family were blue collar workers, who believed in working hard no matter what, prevented me from starting my own business for years. Not only did I have a hard time imagining myself as a business owner, but I was afraid of what they thought about me not punching a clock everyday. I would say things like--- I want to start my own business, but I have to work. What in the world does that even mean?

Listen to yourself speak. Listen to the things that you tell your children. Now ask yourself if that is you or your parents speaking. Your parents may have done the best they could to with you. But your parent's best is not your best. Your parents may be very successful. They may be well educated, provided a great home for you, and may have set an excellent example of family for you as well. But their best is still not your best.

Understand this, you will always be limited by the ability of the people you compare yourself to. Even if the people you are comparing yourself to go by the name of Mom and Dad.

To Blog...Nakeia

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