Friday, April 30, 2010

The Re-launch

I started speaking, unofficially, as a teenager. I was asked to speak to my peers by youth group leaders, principals, and community leaders. I continued to speak sporadically throughout college to student-lead organizations as well as non- profit organizations. Then it all came to a halt when I began to focus on other business endeavors. I have been an unofficial consultant for several businesses, women seeking work-mom-wife balance, and men looking to add a successful home life to their already successful lives as business men.

Well, I have decided to move from unofficial to official a few years back. What has worked for me and those who I have been privilege to have help in the past will work for so many others seeking a way to achieve the life they desire. As I prepare for a re-launch in my new home town, I am branding, working on my website, developing upgrades for this blog, and editing my first book! I am really excited about re-launching the summer!

In the meantime, my goal is to continue blogging daily. However, please forgive me if it is not at the same time everyday or if I miss a yesterday :-(. I will try really hard to be consistent. I am pleased to have found another piece of who I am in addition to wife, full-time mom, song writer, and business manager. But lets face it...I got a lot going on!

As I refocus my efforts, I invite you to spend some time this weekend refocusing yours. There may be more things inside of you waiting to be unleashed. As people we are multi-layered. Peel back those layers by exploring your other gifts. Maybe it will be revealed to you in the form of a hobby like my photography. Maybe your other gift will lead you to some moonlighting as I do as a makeup artist. Maybe there is something that you have already been doing unofficially that should be upgraded to an official status.

Take some time to observe yourself at work with those little things you take for granted. You may discover a business idea, new hobby, or just a way to help others on their journey.

Happy Friday!

To Blog...Nakeia

Wednesday, April 28, 2010


Upgrade: to improve the quality of something, exchange something for something better.

These are indications that it is time for you to upgrade:

If you spend more time crying than laughing in your current is time for you to upgrade. Whoever said that love hurts either never experienced real love or was the one doing the hurting. You deserve to experience true love. So move the person out of the way that is causing you to hurt to make room for the one that will love you for real.

If you call your friend to talk about something important in your life but you spend the entire conversation talking about them…it is time for you to upgrade. A friendship should be reciprocal. If you are never on the receiving end of the friendship, then it is one-sided and lacks balance. As you give love, support, and encouragement to others, you should be replenished with love, support, and encouragement.

If you have been employed by the same company in the same position for years and have never been offered a promotion or a raise…it is time for you to upgrade. In this particular economic climate, I am not suggesting that you quit. However, I am suggesting that you complete a career assessment. Your boss could be waiting for you to show initiative. Prepare yourself for an upgrade by taking advantage of company funded professional development courses. You will be surprised to find out what programs your human resources office offers. Then march into your boss’ office, after knocking of course, and ask for it. With the cutbacks that many of us are facing, it will be cheaper for your company to promote you and increase your pay a little, than to hire someone new and pay them a full salary. You can upgrade from a job to a career simply by researching ways to improve upon your performance and then showing initiative.

Just because you are in a familiar place in your life doesn’t mean you should make it permanent. There is always an opportunity for you to improve the quality of your life by exchanging those things that are not adding value to you for something or someone better.

To Blog…Nakeia

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Mandatory Success...

By definition, success is the achievement of intention. Intention is something that is planned and purposeful. By making a conscious decision to live an intentional life you are setting yourself up for measurable success.

You may not have the house, car, job, marriage, or money that you want right now. But by waking up everyday with a plan that will move you closer to the things you desire in life, and taking the necessary actions to execute that plan, success will no longer be an option for you, it will be mandatory.

If you want to experience success, you must live an intentional life.

To Blog…Nakeia

Monday, April 26, 2010

Reasonable Doubt

Doubt is something that many of us fight against daily. We doubt our own abilities. We doubt the abilities of others concerning us. We sometimes think that it is unlikely that we will succeed in business, ever get married, ever buy a house, ever get out of debt, ever this…and ever that. When we are faced with the same dilemmas after putting forth the same effort to overcome those circumstances, it is reasonable that doubt would form. That is why it is important to maximize your efforts by engaging in actions that will move you forward and not keep you going in circles. If you have been doing the same thing that gets you the same undesirable outcome, it is not only reasonable that you would live in doubt, but doubt should be expected. Doubt can present itself in the form of uncertainty, mistrust, fear, and cause you to lack confidence.

In the United Sates, in certain cases before a jury is sent to deliberate, they are asked to find a person guilty beyond reasonable doubt. Proof beyond a reasonable doubt is proof of such a convincing character that you would be willing to rely and act upon it without hesitation in the most important of your own affairs. In such cases, some doubt may be present; however there is enough evidence that causes one to see beyond that doubt.

In your own life there are certain times when you need to see beyond reasonable doubt. That can be done if you have designed a plan of action that is so convincing that you would be willing to rely and act upon it without hesitation. The reason why most of us doubt is because we lack confidence in our own abilities, we are uncertain about the outcome, and we don’t trust ourselves anymore because of past failures. If you live a life that is intentional, spend time developing yourself personally and professionally, it is possible to live beyond a reasonable doubt.

Examine the evidence in your own life. Is there proof beyond a reasonable doubt that you will succeed? Is there evidence of your planning, preparation, and diligence? If you are found guilty of anything it should be of pursuing a desirable life beyond a reasonable doubt.

To Blog…Nakeia

Friday, April 23, 2010

Thank You for Reading!!!!

Today, I am 50 blog posts in…whoa hoa!!

I am really excited! It took me almost 2 years to start my blog and when I started I committed to blogging every single day. I have missed 1 day because of my schedule and I could barely get to sleep that night. I have shared my moments of growth, stories of other that inspire me, and formulas and principles that have helped me and I believe can help you.

Thank you for your emails and comments. Thank you for spreading the word and referring my blog to others. I am still developing my blog voice and I appreciate you sticking with me as I banter, confess, and share my two cents.

We are all on a journey to find love, success, health, and ultimately happiness. I will continue to blog about things that will help you and I prepare, stay focused, and follow through with our mission to create a desired life.

Stay the course…

To Blog…Nakeia

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Steppping Out of the Box

I have issues…with friends that is…

For years I have asked myself, my family, my husband, and God, why I have such a hard time finding and keeping friends. I am nice, caring, loyal, encouraging, and forgiving…at least I try very hard to be. I’ll be the first to admit that I am also opinionated, moody, and spoiled…at least I try very hard not to be. I am also not a yes girl because I believe I owe it to the people I care about not to be. I have 1 childhood friend left, 4 college girls that I still kick it with, and of course my sister who has no choice in the matter. I honestly believe that we are still going strong because we don’t speak that often. To much of me isn't good for anyone...except my husband and blog readers of course.

Last year I had an epiphany! I liked being alone! I don’t need to be with another person to go shopping, eating, working out, or even for regular conversation. It stems from my childhood. My grandmother, who raised me as her own, worked a few jobs for long hours. While she was working, I had to stay in the house alone. My grandmother had her good friend, who was also a neighbor look in on me while she was gone. Because I had to hang out by myself most of the time, I learned to entertain myself. I began journaling, writing poems and short stories, and reading books. When I needed company I turned on the television and hung out with “The Golden Girls.” So when friends wanted to hang out, I went sometimes but most of the time, I just wanted to be alone…it was what I was use to. Now that I am older; and especially after getting married and having a child, my need for friends sort of increased. I have more things to talk about and play dates to schedule. So I decided to step out of my box and be friendlier so that I can attract more friends. If you really knew me, you would understand just how big that box was for me. Since doing so I have had some ups and down in the friends category, but those who were truly my friends are still going strong.

This may seem a bit silly to most of you…quite frankly I am a bit silly. Most adults don’t have friend issues. But if you are honest with yourselves, you do have issues of your own. What is comfortable to you is not necessary the best thing for you. Step out of the box. Make new friends, go new places, get a new hair cut, buy a new wardrobe, ask someone out on a date, call a meeting with your boss and ask for more a promotion…Do something new!

Shout out to my friends true and new…

To Blog…Nakeia

Wednesday, April 21, 2010


Today, patterns were the focus of my daughter’s lesson. The patterns were filled with fruits, animals, shapes, and numbers. One of the patterns went something like apple, banana, orange, apple, banana, ______. My daughter’s job was to fill in the blank. Since she has been studying patterns for some time now, she doesn’t even need to start at the beginning and recite her way to the end. She takes a quick glance at the patterns and quickly calls out what should come next. In addition to her work books, I try to teach her how to translate her reading, writing, and arithmetic into practical uses for day to day living. Today, I was presented with the perfect opportunity to explain to my daughter how she expresses a specific pattern of behavior everyday around nap-time. At 1pm, every single day, my daughter gets itchy, whinny, and complain-y. Despite the fact that she is visibly and audibly tired, she gives me at least 10 reasons why she shouldn’t take a nap. Eventually, I get her to go to sleep…most days anyway. She wakes up with a second wind and is ready to go! Then around 7:30 pm it starts all over again because…of course…its bed-time.

Whether you realize it or not, you also have a distinct pattern of behavior. You woke up this morning and went about your day the exact same way as the days before. There is a regular or repetitive form, order, or arrangement to your life. You should also know that you are predictable. From the way you eat, drive, speak, and walk, if the person you spent most of your time with were to be quizzed on what you will do next in any of those areas, he or she would be able to complete the pattern.

I want you to recognize your own pattern of behavior. When you set a goal, how to do go about achieving it? When you are given an assignment at work, how do you go about completing it? When you feel afraid, how do you go about dispelling that fear? I want you to uncover any unproductive or unhealthy patterns of behavior in your life. If you are not getting what you want out of life, evaluate your patterns of behavior. Develop a pattern that is productive, predictable and intentional.

To Blog...Nakeia

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Don't Just Survive...Conquer!

Everyone has a story. People suffer from abuse and neglect, disappointment and heartache. Some people become life-long victims of their circumstances and ultimately live their lives emotionally damaged. These people learn to survive by guarding themselves from others. They are often verbal abusers, self-destructors, and commitment dodgers. They complain, blame, deflect, and inflict every chance they get. They respond reflexively to life often without even being aware of the negative effect their childhood abuse, broken home, unsuccessful marriage, failed business, or loss of loved one has had on their life choices. I don’t blame them for finding ways to survive. Before one gains control of his/her emotions, surviving is all one knows how to do. It is better to exist than to just give up completely.

Then there are those who need more than to exist. There are people that have a hard time accepting their bad experiences as all that life has to offer. There are those that don’t want to cope with life, but who want to conquer it. They have suffered rejection, disappointments, physical and verbal abuse, but still desire a good life. So they set out to push past their unpleasant circumstances to experience the joy of not just surviving but mastering life’s difficulties. These people are often over-achievers. They spend their lives building confidence in their ability to thrive by living a life that opposes negativity. They think before they speak because they know how damaging hurtful words can be. They live a life of gratitude because they understand that one bad choice could have shifted their life into a world of self-destruction. They take care in their career and personal life because they understand that it is important to invest in the things that will benefit them the most.

I’ve mentioned they, them and those people…now let’s talk about you.

You have survived the disappointment, heartache, abuse, and setbacks of life. Now…it is time to conquer them. Become a master of difficulty. Some people go through years of therapy just to get to the point where they can admit that bad things happened to them. I was able to start the journey of conquering my life’s difficulties by doing four things.
1. Coming to terms with the fact that bad things happened in my life.
2. Admitting to the fact that those things negatively affected my choices.
3. Made a conscious choice to forgive the people who hurt me
4. Forgave myself for responding reflexively.

This is not a task that can be completed in one day. To move from survivor to conqueror status, you must spend significant time with yourself. You must ask tough questions and be prepared for the answers. You must let go of the past and stop making excuses. You may even have to ask the people that you have hurt as a result of your hurts to forgive you. In the end, to will gain emotional freedom, be able to move fluidly to your next stage in life, and thrive in a healthier emotional environment. If you have been held back by your emotional tantrums, afraid to to try something new from fear that you will mess it up, have a hard time building significant's time to stop surviving in life and start conquering it!

To Blog…Nakeia

Monday, April 19, 2010

Know Your Stuff!

As you may already know, my husband and I own a music production company. When we first met, he was traveling as a musician and breaking away from a previous company to launch his own. Before he allowed me to take an active role in the business, he gave me several books to read. I read about the responsibilities of musicians, composers, librettists, lyricists, producers, singers, lawyers, managers, accountants, and record labels. I also read about how contracts, publishing, copyright, and royalties works. I learned everything there is to know about the music business…of course I had to because my husband literally quizzed me on it!

Fast forward a few years of working in the business and I did the same thing to friends and clients looking to break into the business. I gave them the same books, speeches, and quizzes my husband gave me. Some of them passed but most of them failed. For some reason people believe they will be able to get by on talent alone, even after hearing the hundreds of stories major artists have to share about getting burned by managers, labels and lawyers. I have horror stories of my own that I could share even after all of the research I continue to do. I have lost friendships, major deals, and much money all because people fail to research the field they choose to pursue.

I was reminded of the importance of organized study after a few phone calls with a client this weekend. She is a very talented writer and singer that came to us asking for artist development, original music composition, and production. Because she had no knowledge of how the business of music works, we had to halt further services with her. Fortunately she is a pretty smart cookie. She agreed to do some organize studying of her own and even went on to consult with an attorney. She called this weekend knowledgeable of the responsibilities that everyone involved must play and ready to begin...again. She even apologized for coming to us before she had a complete understanding of the road again. I appreciated her honesty and her commitment to her talent and herself. Despite the fact that I share the same speech with all of my potential clients, some get it and some don’t.

I am referencing the music business in this instance. However, the same rules apply to every boss and employee in every industry. Know your stuff! Researching your field not only prepares you for the work that must be done, but it will prevent you from being taken advantage of. If you work for someone else you should investigate the standard pay grade for the position you hold, the work that is required, and ways to further develop. If you are in business for yourself, you should know the facts about the employees you need to hire, the clientele you wish to service, and how you can constantly evolve as a company. I am not there to quiz you so quiz yourself. How much do you really know? How can you learn more?

Knowledge is only a source of power when it is implemented.

To Blog…Nakeia

Friday, April 16, 2010

Grateful Friday...

Unemployment: 9.7 percent with 15.0 million people jobless.

Divorce: 41-50 percent of 1st marriages end in divorce.

Child Death: 20 million children under 5 years old die every year. In 2008, 8.8 million children under the age of five died (globally).

If you have a place of employment, are happily married (or living single), have healthy children, nieces, nephews, god-children, or cousins…take some time to pray for those who don’t and give thanks for the fact the you do.

Make today a grateful Friday!

To Blog…Nakeia

Thursday, April 15, 2010

From Confusion to Order...

So there is another word I was sort of forced to brush up on this week… (drum roll please)…confuse. I am sure you are thinking…why does she feel the need to look that one up? Well, once again I am glad you’ve asked. I use this word often. Sometimes I use it figuratively…like when someone says or does something I feel is ridiculous. I answer them with a sarcastic I’m confused…as in…I am confused by the fact that the person believes what was just done or said was acceptable. Other times I use the word confuse when I am really…well…confused.

Today, however, I discovered brand new (to me) uses for the word. To confuse is to disturb the mind of purpose. To be confused is to be in a state of disorder. This word defines the need for personal and professional development. What I try to do each day is to develop, discover, and research ways to bring order to my life by pursuing my purpose. For years I lived in a state of confusion. I was disturbed by experiences, choices, relationships, you name it…it disturbed me. Externally, I was in order. I kept a neat home and arranged my daily schedule to be as productive as possible. Internally, however, I was a mess. I was happy one minute and sad the next. I was pursuing one career, while studying to become something else. I was just really confused! Then, I discovered my purpose and began pursuing it by designing a plan that brought order to all of the chaos in my life.

If your mind has been disturbed of its purpose and you live in a state of disorder, I encourage you to begin to design a plan that will bring order and a clear purpose to your life. Personal development and enlightenment is not for lazy people who lack vision, sobbing women looking someone to fix things, or young adults trying to find themselves. It is for people who are NOT confused but who know they were born to contribute to this earth by living an intentional and abundantly successful life. Dispel the confusion in your life. Invest in your personal and professional development daily.

To Blog…Nakeia

Wednesday, April 14, 2010


I am one that does not like to have a word present in my vocabulary without knowing the proper way to use. So since I have heard the word frustrated use a lot lately…mostly coming from my own mouth…I decided to brush up on the meaning of the word.

So here it is…

Frustrate: To make ineffectual, to bring to nothing, to produce feelings of discouragement

Frustrated: Feeling deep insecurity, balked in some endeavor

Frustration: Chronic state of insecurity and dissatisfaction arising from unresolved problems or unfulfilled needs

So…with that means exactly what I thought it meant and fact still remains…MY LIFE FRUSTRATES ME!!!

So…what am I going to do about it? Well…

I am going to encourage myself by focusing on the things I can control and stay on task with the things I intend to achieve.

I am going to secure my place in this journey of development by continuing to be intentional and move forward with maximum capacity.

Finally, I am going to take the time to settle any resolved problems and find a way to fulfill my needs.

Sounds simple…right? That is because most things in life are just that simple. We complicate things by investing unfocused energy into what frustrates us instead of focusing our energy on the actions that we have to ability to take to dispel the frustration. As for the things that are beyond our control, limit your exposure to it. The people, places, and things that are in your life exist because you allow it; such as your spouse, friends, job, residence, etc. If any of those people or things frustrates you on a consistent basis, then it may be time to consider their place in your life.

As for me, will I get frustrated again? Probably…however now…I have an active plan to dispel it.

To Blog…Nakeia

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

The Truth About Fear...

Simply stated, fear is an emotion that is based on the anticipation of an unpleasant occurrence. When it comes to personal and professional development, fear usually sets in after visualizing the future and in it one sees failure. Or…when attempting some sort of action, one takes into account a previous action that may have failed. No matter how you define fear, it has no place in your life. Fear is the arch nemesis of faith. Faith is complete confidence, a belief with total conviction, or trust in something and is necessary for someone on a mission to fulfill his or her destiny.

Now that we have the definitions out of the way, this is what I want you to do. Take all of the fear you have about going after that promotion, launching your new business, relocating to another state, writing that book, getting rid of that toxic relationship, going blond, shaving your beard…WHATEVER it is…and replace it with faith. Have complete confidence, belief with total conviction, and trust in your ability to design a plan, take effective action and succeed at whatever you intend to achieve.

That is what development is all about…taking the time to invest in your ability to be in constant progression. When you put in the work, you should be able to visualize a successful future. Despite past failures, you can learn and begin again more effectively. You have nothing to fear when your faith is not just in you, but in your measurable efforts to succeed in every area of your life.

Fear not and move forward with faith!

To Blog…Nakeia

Monday, April 12, 2010

Be In It, To Win It!

So I am just about at my 7th week of consistently working out after my 6 month long break. It has been difficult, not because of the work outs…I mean…I came to the realization that working out will be difficult a long time ago. It’s the getting up out of bed, usually after a long night, and taking the 15 minute drive to the gym, climbing up the stairs and opening the door to the cycling room. But when I get on that bike, its game time! I am in it, to win it! However, lately I realized something about myself. I have managed to get back into the swing of things fairly easily, but if I am completely honest, when the instructor would say increase that resistance, I pretended as if I was so into my ride that I didn’t hear her. Now I had resistance on and the ride wasn’t easy. But…I could have done more.

So, after having a long talk with myself about what I needed to do to achieve what I wanted…I did it. I increased that resistance and pushed through it! It wasn’t easy and I had to adjust my speed. But…I did it! As a result…I lost about 5 inches total over the past two weeks! Sounds good, right? Not so much…because if I am still being honest, I can do more. I mean, I am working out 5 days a week…pretty hard. Last week, I even added a 75 minute total conditioning class. I am going hard! Except for when it comes to what I eat. I do the organic chicken breast and salads with homemade dressing, the bananas and apples, the egg whites and fresh salsa for added veggies. BUT…in between those nutritious meals, I sneak in a couple of Lays potato chips, or Starbucks white chocolate mocha, or…and hear is where I really go wrong…I enjoy some of my husbands deliciously sweet baked goods. There! I confess! I am a mess when it comes to eating. So…I need to do more. I need to push myself even further. If I am truly in it to win it, then I must stay in the game especially outside of the gym. The instructor reminded us that being fit is 20% workouts and 80% eating well. Once again, I had a conversation with myself on the way home from the gym this morning and I am ready to push even harder! You will be pleased to hear that I drove right past Starbucks despite the temptation to do a quick drive-by.

I shared my stay healthy madness with you not just to oust myself for the purpose of accountability. I share because I know that I am not alone. You have the ability to do more and achieve more. Some of you need to have the same kind of conversation with yourself that I had to have with myself. In order to achieve what you want, you must be willing to do what needs to be done. Push through the resistance and be in it to win it!

Today, complete a self assessment. Determine 1 way that you can do more to achieve your goals in your personal and professional life and commit to making it happen this week. Maybe you could enroll in a course that will enhance your professional development. Maybe you could commit to reading at least 1 personal development book each month. Whatever it is that you can do to achieve more, commit to making it happen…starting today!

To Blog…Nakeia

Friday, April 9, 2010

The Power of Pink...

Sometimes life can be just too darn serious. With business, bills, babies, workouts, meal plans, spouses, traffic, writing, reading, researching, cleaning, speaking, breathing…sometimes it can be too much! Whenever I feel this way I break out the big gun…the color Pink…PINK! It has always been my favorite color…it makes me happy, brightens up my day, and makes me feel all girlie on the inside. That is exactly how I need to feel when things get overwhelming.

So…I am breaking out OPI’s Heartthrob nail color for a manicure and pedicure, M.A.C’s eye shadows in Vex for my lid, Sketch in the crease, and Vanilla and Seedy pearl to highlight under my brow…for my cheeks just a touch of Dolly Mix and for the lips, an explosion of Icescape Lipglass. Then I’m throwing on my hot pink flats from Target, and my equally hot pink HOBO handbag to accessorize my comfortable blue jeans and baby tee. Once I am totally pinked…I’m packing up the mini-me and the hubby and we’re off for a night out on the town. We will probably end up at Stevie B’s where I will fill up at the salad bar leaving just enough room for 1 slice of loaded baked potato pizza. Finally, I will complete my day by sipping on a 20oz bottle of ice-cold Wild cherry Pepsi while watching the comedy channel with my main squeeze…

I don’t know if you love the color pink as much as I do…but whatever it is that will take your mind off of the complicated things of life and placed it on things that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, good, and virtuous, take the time this weekend to do it.

Pink Rocks!

To Blog…Nakeia

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Be Intentional...

There are so many things that are beyond our control. The weather, marketplace, time, traffic, and aging are just some of the things we experience beyond our control. And then…there is you. You are the one thing that will always be at your disposal. Take advantage of that control by living an intentional life. To be intentional is to have in mind a purpose, plan and design for your life. There should be a purpose for every action you take…everyday. You should go to work with the intention of being as productive in your position as possible. You should come home with the intention of adding as much love, peace, and joy to yourself and your family as possible. Nothing should be without purpose, plan, and design.

There isn’t a person that I have spoken to so far this week that doesn’t feel success, opportunity, and wealth pulling at their heart. It’s in the air. You wake up thinking of ways that you can do better and experience more and your ideas and hopes keep you up at night. Well if you are going to experience the life you desire, you must be intentional! Stop leaving your life in the hands of chance, fate, and coincidence. I believe in the undeniable effects of positive thinking and words of confession and assertion. BUT, when you are done thinking about it and finished talking about it, you must act on it. For your actions to be effective, they must be intentional. When I suggest that you write down your wants, needs, and goals and I ask you to design a plan of action; I do those things so that you always move forward with clear intentions. If you want that new job, promotion, business deal, book, house…or whatever you desire right now to become a reality in your life, you must move forward with an intentional purpose, plan, and design.

Take a moment today to make sure that you have been intentional. Review your goal or mission statement and decide if you are on task. Ask yourself what I have I done so far today or yesterday to move myself closer to achieving the things I desire. I suggest that you go even further and give yourself a goal of at least 1 to 3 intentional actions toward your goal each day.

Do what you need to do so that you can have what you want to have…

To Blog…Nakeia

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Throw Away Your To Do List!

Throw away your To Do List! Yeah…you read it correctly. Throw it away! It’s nothing but a long list of things that you rarely get through during the course of one day. Most of the things on the list just end up on the next days to do list. The reason why most people fail at completing their list is because it is equivalent to a Wish List. You work all week and try to catch up on the weekend and when you fall behind; you sit down and write a list of things to do. Think about it…you write down all of your house work, kid’s projects, unfinished workload, self-grooming, emails, phone calls, networking, and on…and on. Then you start at number one and wish hope for the best. So, take some of the pressure off of your hectic life, and get rid of it!

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s get productive!

Replace that To Do List with a Must Do List…

Instead of a long list of things that it would be great to get done before your day is complete, write a short list of things that must get done in order to complete your day. In order for your list to be effective it must have an objective. The basis of your objective should always be to move you forward. For instance, if you are in business for yourself, sending out 100 emails to potential clients detailing your next event is not a to do…it‘s a must do. It will make all of the difference in furthering your business. To take your list to the next level, you can expand your Must Do List over the course of a week and make Monday the day that you must complete your emails. Or…if you are as neurotic as I, you can compile a Must Do List that is managed by time. You can delegate 9am to 11am just for emails daily. That type of must do list creates a habit of getting things done because it establishes a routine that will become automatic after some consistency. Do whatever works best for you but remember to keep it short. My lists are usually no more than 5 things. This makes it do-able. You shouldn’t measure yourself by how many things you attempt, but how many things you actually complete…effectively.

If you want to be more productive, throw away your To Do List and replace it with a Must Do List!

To Blog…Nakeia

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

The Truth is...

I get upset, discouraged, annoyed, doubtful, fearful, and just plain mad from time to time. I do not always wake up with a smile on my face…ready to face the world. Sometimes I need to adjust my attitude, apologize to my husband for snapping (almost daily), and pray that tomorrow is better than today. I need more money, a boost in business, to loose more weight, a bigger house, new friends, and a new handbag (I just had to throw that one in).

…That is the reason I do what I do…

It keeps me accountable for what I choose to do in times of uncertainty and offers authentic words of empowerment…authentic because I use then to empower me…not just you. Everything that I mentioned that I feel from time to time, I flush out of my system with books, blogs, CD’s, and DVD’s that add to my personal, professional, and spiritual development.

It is important to prepare yourself with resources that will empower you to combat the doubt, fear and anxiety that may try to oppose you. You can’t turn on the television without being exposed to death, devastation, and hysteria. At work you can get bombarded by your co-worker’s family drama and your boss’ unreasonable demands. Shield the impact of that negativity. Start and end your day on a positive note. Read a book of inspirational quotes by prominent figures. Pop in a DVD of your favorite comedian and laugh yourself to sleep. Send up a prayer for someone else and take your mind off of your own circumstances. Meditate daily to de-stress, open yourself up to new ideas, and just listen to what your body is telling you it needs…AND…READ MY BLOG…

To Blog…Nakeia

Monday, April 5, 2010


The mothers of my old church would often say…I may not be what I should be but I thank God I am not what I use to be. That phrase is the first thing that I thought about after a conversation with my friend the other day. Both of us were adamant about things that we wanted to accomplish in a particular time frame. She has been in business for 1 ½ years and has made progress but has a strong desire to do more. She is a very creative being and has idea after idea for her current business and a few businesses to come. She is very passionate about her work and sometimes she finds herself in over-drive. I too find myself in over-drive. The project that I am currently working on has been in the works for a year. It is fully developed. I am just waiting for the opportunity to press go. Unfortunately, the entire world does not work off of my time-line. I must admit, that I get really frustrated. I am task-oriented and I like to maintain control over every area of my life.

I had my whole life mapped out on a single sheet of paper by the age of 16 ½. I looked for that piece of paper a few years back, and I am so grateful that I couldn’t find it. I am no where near the frame of mind that I was in at 16 (thankfully so). On that list was the college I would attend, the person I would married, the number of children I would have and their names, the state I would live in, and even the kinds of clothes and makeup I would wear. None of those things are apart of my life now…with the exception of my vow to always wear pink lip-gloss…but I digress.

The fact of the matter is...we can sulk over failed to-do lists, scheduling issues, and unresolved plans. Or…we can take a moment to appreciate the progress we have made. My friend may not be exactly where she wants to be in her career, however in 1 ½ years she has turned what was just a concept into a successfully growing business. There isn’t a doubt in my mind that if she continues to be diligent, her efforts will be rewarded. I ended our conversation by telling her that I can’t wait to see how she progresses even more in the next 1 ½ years.

I am not exactly where I want to be in my life, but I am grateful for the opportunities I have been prepared for and for those to come. I have a new sheet of paper, with a new list of things I want accomplish. What I will do now is appreciate my progress as I make my way down that list.

As you think of where you are in your life and career today, don't forget to be grateful for how much progress you've already made and the person that you've become.

To Blog…Nakeia

Friday, April 2, 2010

Life Lessons From Hot Yoga

Yesterday was my first day of Hot Yoga class. Innovated by Bikram Choudhury, Hot Yoga is a series of yoga poses done in a heated room. The room is usually maintained at a temperature of 95-105 degrees. As you can imagine, a vigorous yoga session at that temperature promotes profuse sweating and makes the body very warm, and therefore more flexible.

We ended the class with a few minutes of total body relaxation. The instructor guided us through our breaths as we went to a place of calmness and ease. She asked us to imagine walking through a beautiful forest filled with flowers and trees and running streams. We were to imagine taking that walk with our spouse or best friend. She allowed us a moment of silence as we reflected on that peaceful place. Then she asked us to imagine that same walk, in that same forest, still accompanied by that same person; after being stranded due to car trouble. That was a lesson in perception. She told us to go to that peaceful place whenever we were experiencing something uncomfortable and stressful.

I thought that was an excellent example of perception. In light of the car trouble in the instructor’s verbal illustration, a walk that was peacefully enjoyed by me and a loved one could easily turn into a miserable hike through the woods, based on my perception of my current circumstance. The elements in the second illustration is exactly the same…there are beautiful trees, flowers, and streams surrounding me even though my car is stuck on the side of the road. I can choose to take it in or ignore it. I could say…I enjoyed a few moments of clam, from my walk through the forest, on the way to get help that eased some of the stress of being stranded on the side of the road. OR…I could say…I had to hike my way through the woods to get some help after being stranded on the side of the road. Either way you perceive it, your circumstance is almost identical, except for the fact that you could have de-stressed on the way to get help.

You will receive what you perceive. That is the lesson I learned from Hot Yoga class…

To Blog…Nakeia

Thursday, April 1, 2010

A Moment of Gratitude...

Finances, marriage, children, health, houses, cars, and jobs…there is so much to concern ourselves with. There are so many roles and so much responsibility riding on our shoulders. Day after day I personally wonder if I will be able to handle it all. I wonder when my next opportunity will come and if I am doing enough to maintain sustain my marriage, child, and my own personal wellness. Then I turn on National Geographic Channel and see how parents in Mauritania are force-feeding their daughters to fatten them up so that they appear more desirable to men. I see parents at Saint Jude praying through tears for their children’s health. I see a spike in the divorce rate that was already at its worst. I heard about a woman that I went to high school with being buried after loosing a battle with breast cancer.

…Then it is all put into perspective…

For every complaint I waste my breath on, there is someone…somewhere taking their last breath…

Use just one breath today expressing your gratitude for something good in your life. You have your health, a job, a child that is in good health, a husband to hug, a wife to kiss…you may not have it all, but there is someone…somewhere that has nothing.

Make today a day of gratitude…

To Blog…Nakeia